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Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Woohoo, no words, big love...

Oscar had his bone marrow biopsy and lumber puncture last Thursday and today we can confirm that he is still in remission - no signs of leukemia in his blood!! So, in this moment of now we are very, very lucky, grateful, happy......words are inadequate.

Sorry I haven't been updating the blog but we were sick for about a month with this nasty flu and basically did a lot of this:
So Oscar's bone marrow was cancelled several times and our usual routines of random chaos were even more disorganised and chaotic than normal.

The day of the actual bone marrow and lumber puncture procedure was a reminder of how un-fun it can be to keep a toddler away from food. Unfortunately, his first lot of bloods clotted so we had to redo them and wait that bit longer and Oscar, being older and wiser, kept pointing to the fridge in the waiting room telling me, "But there is milk in there mummy. Give it to me." He had been so good up until that point and I had explained to both Oscar and Auden what was going to happen as best I could but......I think we all blanked out how hard these days are. I can't believe we did that on a weekly/fortnightly basis for so long and I am very grateful my brain is so forgetful.

Of course, we were so well looked after by all the staff at the Oncology Clinic that we can only be thankful that they are such a wonderful bunch of people who we cannot thank enough. I had intended on taking cards and baking a cake to find some way to show even a small token of our appreciation but I just couldn't get my head together. How does one say thanks for all the extraordinary things they do for us while still managing to make it look and feel ordinary. Again, words insufficient...

No matter what the circumstances of our life at any given moment we know we are very, very blessed and I guess the best way to thank the staff is to live a full and happy life with Oscar grabbing each moment of joy along the way. This is especially poignant for us at this particular time as my Aunt has recently relapsed following a stem cell transplant and is doing it very tough in hospital at the moment. I can't possibly write this entry without mentioning her and all the unconditional love she gives to all of us and send out my deepest love and wishes for her and her family at this time.

I wish there was more I could say. I wish there was more I could do......

This journey is a rollercoaster and I'd like to think that I have somehow learnt something or evolved in some way out of all of it. In reality though I think all I have learnt is that I know nothing at all and that anything I thought I knew or had any kind of control over was just an illusion. The only actual fact that I can confirm is that LOVE helps - A LOT.

Take care beautiful people and thanks for checking in on us. Much love, Cindy x